| Title: Data Sharing Scenario
Characters:Dr. Hans Brockner (PI, Senior Faculty) Dr. Michael Capeless, a Colleague conducting research at a participating university Chorus of inebriated undergraduates NO SCENE, AN ETHICAL COURTROOM IN PSYCHIC SPACE The Chorus advances as suppliants towards Dr. Brockner, who appears to be asleep. They are garlanded with strings of beer cans. CHORUS Yo! Dr. Brockner, we call on you! Heed our just petition! BROCKNER Huh? Who are you? Why are you carrying all those cans? CHORUS We are your study subjects, Undergraduates Who Use Alcohol In Social Situations. BROCKNER What, are you all dead? CHORUS We, like you, are comfortably asleep, but our spirits walk abroad to remind you of your promise. BROCKNER What promise? CHORUS ”Data collected in confidence. Subject's identity will not be revealed.” BROCKNER I remember the promise. It was repeated for every subject at every participating campus. Who, then, has threatened to reveal your identity? CHORUS Dr. Michael Capeless has gotten a job at a State University . BROCKNER A non-participating institution. This is already known to me. CHORUS He plans to take our identities with him to the West Coast. Only you can preserve the confidentiality agreement! BROCKNER And so I shall! I am the Principal Investigator; I gave my word! Capeless shall not abscond with the data. CHORUS Thank you, Dr. Brockner. Although inebriated, we are not ungrateful. (Noise of a resume being shaken furiously.) But who is approaching? It is he! It is Dr. Capeless! CAPELESS So! The study subjects have preceded me! It is no matter. They shall not impeach the justice of my cause. CHORUS We tremble, but Dr. Brockner will not be so easily shaken. BROCKNER Capeless! Congratulations on the Berkeley job. I hear you want to take the data with you. CAPELESS I still have analysis to run. The Department there is very interested. CHORUS As well they might be. Imbibing is not unknown in California . Let them study their own Undergraduates Who Use! BROCKNER I'll handle this, if you don't mind. Michael, there's a confidentiality problem here. CAPELESS I signed the pledge when Southern Illinois joined the study. BROCKNER But you signed on behalf of your institution, not yourself. Nothing was said about taking the data to a campus that didn't participate in the study. CHORUS Especially Berkeley! BROCKNER Hush up, you Undergraduates Who Use! I am questioning Dr. Capeless. CAPELESS It seems you're questioning my integrity! Do you think I'd publish the subjects' names and Grade Point Averages on the Internet? BROCKNER Of course not. But the original agreement stipulated that the data was not to leave the consortium of participating campuses. CAPELESS It's my data. I spent three years collecting it. When I leave Southern Illinois , there'll be no one left who can use it. The people at Berkeley are interested. They've got the resources to exploit it. They're counting on it. That's partly why I got the job. CHORUS Traitor! Dissembler! BROCKNER Michael, I cannot let you take the raw data. CAPELESS If you try and stop me, I'll sue! CHORUS Lawsuits! Lawsuits! We'll give you lawsuits you'll never forget! BROCKNER ( suddenly very tired ) I've had enough of the nightmare. I'd like to wake up now.